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Zyro Yuellas
Consul
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Posts : 114
Join date : 2012-05-29
Location : Seated at the command chair of the CCS Khaki Diablo

PostSubject: Audio Recordings   Tue Jan 15, 2013 2:30 pm

Pionus Ignaire Lounge & ECR Audio: 2920 Units, 15 Aberax Term, 13 NCSY

>>Arelei: Daen? What are you eating?
>>Daen: ... I don't know. But whatever it is, it's really chewy.
>>Arelei: Huh? So ... what? Did you pull that out of storage and stuff it into your mouth? That's not a safe habit.
>>Daen: Well, it does have a nice after-taste. I can't describe it. 'Member that time the High Seer cooked up something for the officers? It tastes just like that.
>>Arelei: And you're certain that it's not it?
>>Daen: Yes! No. I think. Uh...
>>Engineer: Did I come in at a bad time?
>>Daen: Not yet, it's not.
>>Engineer: I just came in for a drink. What ARE you eating?
>>Daen: I really don't know, Raul. I really don't know.
>>Announcement's Message: Attention all fellow peeps and cronies, I need all officers in the Executive Conference Room in a few days. Well, right now, actually. Matter's kinda urgent.
>>Arelei: Hmm... I wonder what it is this time.
>>Daen: Or *who* it is.
>>Arelei: Huh?
>>Daen: You know. This week's unfortunate victim.
>>Raul: Victim of what? I wonder.
>>Daen: Serving on the galaxy's most dangerous ship. Do I need to mention last week's shenanigans? The pie?
>>Arelei: Oh, don't start. If you keep this up, we're going to be late again.
>>Daen: It's probably about Yuellas' business with Cradle Station. D'ya hear about what happened in one of their training exercises?
>>Arelei: What?
>>Daen: Well, it was one of the live scenarios that they do there. Somewhere in an asteroid belt. The rookies were divided into red and blue teams. Red was supposed to search one end of a space station for the missing green team, while Blue was supposed to secure their foothold on the station and to recover enemy battle plans on the other end.
>>Raul: Then someone with a brilliant idea raises the attention of both teams. A little competition. Who can complete their objectives first?
>>Arelei: Go on.
>>Daen: Well, there are some communication disturbances and both teams lose their connections to the local battle net along with Cradle Station itself.
>>Raul: This seems impossible at first.
>>Daen: Turns out that the station’s own communication network is being jammed. Later, a member of Blue team reaches Red team and tells them that something’s attacking the station and that the rest of his team is missing. Now, Cradle Station at the time thought that the Ryyhargon are behind the attack and that this was the result of a feud between client members. But this was not the case. Cradle sent a couple of corvettes to check it out, who reported serkan cruisers to be behind the attack. They did manage to evacuate Red Team and that Blue straggler, but the rest were never found.
>>Arelei: That sounds bad.
>>Scientist: It is.
>>Arelei: What do you mean?
>>Scientist: Meeting subject. Mustn’t be late.
>>Daen: Dammit, Xier, the Conference Hall is right ‘round the corner.
>>Uniformed Officer: Finally. Sometimes I think you guys try to take your time getting to places.
>>Raul: Hey, Zyro.
>>Zyro: That's a fine hello to your commanding officer. Oh and close the door behind you.
>>The Oracle: Welcome and thank you for arriving so promptly.
>>Zyro: Pfft-ha ha hah! Anyway, down to biz. I’m sure all of you know about that incident with Avail Station? The one about those unidentified attackers and whatnot? We’ve ID’d them as ships from the Denali Union. They’ve declared war on both the Triumvirate and the Ryyhargon, thinking that they can take us both on, though the Ryyhargon’ll be nothing.
>>Raul: The Denali Union?
>>Xier: Exiled Traders. Responsible for omega scenario in Kalassani Systems.
>>Zyro: We lack any real intel on their current politics or territory. Their ships are stolen pieces from the Confederate Armada, this we can confirm.
>>Daen: What're we gonna do about it, boss?
>>Zyro: Easy. We're going to fly over to some of their important crap and blow it up! We're leaving in a few hours. Have fun preparing ... or doing whatever it is you do when you're not killing each other or planning how you'll be late for the next meeting. That is all.
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Zyro Yuellas
Consul
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Posts : 114
Join date : 2012-05-29
Location : Seated at the command chair of the CCS Khaki Diablo

PostSubject: Re: Audio Recordings   Mon Jan 21, 2013 3:20 pm

I hate your whimper!

Acertis Sector
Relium System
Planet Brygg
Delnaris City
Current Population: 9,825,550

10 NCSY
Saract 27
8:37/26 Cycle "Morning"
Streets of Delnaris


Daen: Mmmmrah. Shore break's fine, but you never really...
Arelei: What?
Daen: Well. It's not the same as regular break.
Arelei: I have no idea what you're talkinig about.
Daen: Wait a sec. That guy over there, see him?
Arelei: Hmm? Oh. Yeah? ... Wait, haven't we seen him before?
Daen: Yup. He's been walking around, doing nothing... It's like he's watching everything.
Arelei: Don't be silly. Well ... you know what? Now that I think about it, it doesn't seem SO far fetched. Just imagine: "the secret agent who gathers information working for a mysterious organization!"
Daen: Heh. You know what? I'm calling Raul.
Arelei: Huh? Why?
Daen: Shh! Raul? Hey, it's me.
Raul: Yes, yes, yes! ... what? Who's "me"?
Daen: I'm sending a picture of this suspicious looking guy. I need you to run a background check on him.
Raul: Wait, what? Is that you, Daen? My caller ID is malfunctioning. And are you serious? Like the way they do it in those crime films? Oh, yeah, sure. I can totally do that!
Daen: Of course I'm serious! Why do you think I'm whispering, but whispering in a way that's kinda loud and dramatic?!
Arelei: Geh.
Raul: Argh! It's really blury! Are you serious? Send another one, dammit. I can't work with this one. Sloppy angle, hey, I can see your hand! That's not very professional, Mister Not-professional!
Daen: Raul! Blast! He's moving away. I think he saw us.
Arelei: You think? Come one! Let's follow him.
Daen: Okay, okay. How's it going so far, Raul?
Raul: I'm too sick for this crap. We're supposed to be on break.
Daen: Are you doing it?
Raul: Yes, yes ... Okay, looking past your frighteningly terrible photographic skills, I managed to identify the man. His name is ... Krins-il-ith! Krinsilith!
Daen: You sure?
Raul: Positive, man! You can't mistake that face and history with anyone else!
Arelei: Wait, you've already got info on him?
Raul: Ouch! Arelei, that hurt my feelings ... Of course I do! You forget who you're dealing with!
Arelei: Okay, so what do you have?
Raul: Let's see here, other than those notes you have on him, loitering in public areas, blah, blah, blah, there's nothing on him.
Daen: What? Try again!
Raul: No, I'm serious. There's just nothing on the network. It's either censored or deleted, and anything that I've cracked is completely incohesive.
Daen: Uurgh! Then what do we do?
Raul: I don't know... Follow him for a bit? Isn't that what you're already doing?

10 NCSY
Saract 27
10:28/26 Cycle "Mature Morning" << TWO HOURS LATER
Delnaris City, Eastern Meerkantil Districts


Arelei: Okay, this is getting nowhere. He's just standing there, clearly aware that we've been following him for the past hour.
Daen: Hmm ... I guess you're right.
Arelei: Call Raul and see if he's picked anything up yet ... teehee! That rhymes!
Daen: Aaaand ... Raul! You there?
Raul: I've told you before, you don't need to scream into the mouth piece. I presume you're still nosing around?
Daen: Maybe. Look, we've got nothing. How about you?
Raul: Oh. You wanted me to scan the network or something? I've already done that and I'm not doing it again. I know I missed nothing.
Daen: What do we keep you around for?
Raul: Don't make an issue of this, Daen. If you're so burning to know about this guy, just ask an information broker, I'm sure they have crap on him.
Arelei: No way! They ALWAYS want something in return.
Raul: Of course they do, that's what people have been doing for millions of years--trading one thing for another. I've dealt with these kinds of people before, they're not that bad! Honest.
Daen: ... It's probably nothing, but my gut says otherwise.
Arelei: Aawwll, can't you just sleep on this? We don't need to see one of those cretins!
Daen: Fine. But if I see that fella tomorrow, I'll be willing to tell this so called "Information Broker" about the pie.
Arelei: ... B-By the Unseen...
Daen: It was a joke, it was a joke! Don't give me that look!

10 NCSY
Saract 28
6:08/26 Cycle "Early Morning" << THE NEXT DAY
Delnaris City, Kolsc Hotel Floor 3, Room 63
Current Residents: 120


Daen: Harh. *sniff* oh yay. Another fine day yet to be ruined by ... no way. NO WAY. No... way. What the hell?!
Arelei: And you're up again, screaming at the curtains. Heehee! ... Daen? Sorry. Are you OK?
Daen: It's him.
Arelei: Who...? Oh my gods. How did he? Oh crap, oh crap ... That's so scary.
Raul: Oh, there you are, Arelei. Phell requested your assistance with some injury or other.
Daen: Raul, come here!
Raul: What? Why are you--?! ... Is that actually him outside the window, staring up at us? This is not good. Don't eat anything that anyone gives you, I'll be right back!
Daen: Okay Arelei, still want to avoid that information broker?
Arelei: Him? What about us?!
Daen: Calm down! You're starting to scare me.
Raul: I've arranged a meeting. Delnaris Port Town. There's a murky, totally not-suspicious looking alley that I'll mark on your HUD's map. Go find your gear so I can do it. That. Turn your crap on, dammit!
Daen: OK, Raul, let's roll! We'll sneak through the rear entrance.
Arelei: Hey, look. He's leaving.
Raul: ...or he's just moving to his nice ambush spot to wait and backstab you on your way out to blackmailing him or something. Have fun, enjoy yourselves, I'll stay here with Phell and ... I don't know, back you up from here.

10 NCSY
Saract 28
10:12/26 Cycle "Mature Morning" << FOUR HOURS OF STEALTHY, COOL WALKING/RUNNING IN FEAR... LATER
Delnaris City, Port Town, First Loading Dock Sector, Seedy Alley


Information Broker: Well. Looks like you finally arrived. We're on a tight schedule, for your information.
Daen: You're Trak?
Trak: That is correct. What can we do for you?
Daen: What do you know of Krinsilith?
Trak: Lots of things, many things, we do. But do be specific. What would you request of us?
Arelei: ...I have a bad feeling about this...
Daen: Heh. I guess everything, actually.
Trak: Hmm, mmmnhmmnnhmmmn... *quick audible inhale* We like you. Business will be pleasurable, no?
Daen: I hear you want information to trade.
Trak: That we do. However, I know all that you could possibly tell us, but perhaps there is another way, no?
Arelei: ...and my bad feelings are always followed ... by really bad things!...
Daen: Another way? Enlighten me.
Trak: There is an individual of interest to us ... his name is Sraetl Africanus, male, fourty-seven standard cycles old, two-hundred and thirty-three units tall, citizen reference number of seven-dash-nine, eight, zero, four. He has a colourful reputation among the poor folk of Port Town. He shan't be difficult to locate. This dossier can provide additional data that will satisfy any basic information you could require. However, the information we want... we desire ... we require ... incriminating evidence is all I ask, sire! Haha!
Daen: Incriminating evidence? Hmm... I think I can help you. I'll be back with this so called evidence.
Trak: Mmmhmmhmmhmmhmmhmm!
Daen: Okay, okay, I was freaked out too.
Arelei: "Freaked out"?!
Daen: Uh... sure?
Arelei: I thought he wanted to kill us!
Daen: You're not worried about death on the Ignaire.
Arelei: But HE was different!
Daen: We meet hundreds of aliens every day. Half of them speak like he does. What's up with that?
Arelei: ... Uh... I don't know. I think it's the way he presents himself. His aura, you know?
Daen: Mmmkay. This part of town is busier. Let's just keep quiet for now, until we get to ... okay, it says on the dossier that his favourite location to stay at is locally known as "RS". Do you know what that means?
Arelei: It should say.
Daen: Ah, here we are. Ryyhargon Shots. It's a gentlemens club in a behind-us direction.
Arelei: You just HAD to start walking before knowing where to go. Now people are looking at us strangely.

10 NCSY
Saract 28
10:26/26 Cycle "Late Morning" << MINUTES OF WALKING LATER
Delnaris City, Port Town, Grand Causeway


Arelei: Why don't we just call Raul and ask him to do a search on ... what was his name again? Sraightal?
Daen: ... That's actually a great idea and yes, Sraetl.
Raul's Communication Line-Number-Thingy: ... ... ...
Daen: No answer.
Arelei: Call Raul again.
Daen: I know. And stop saying that.
Arelei: Call Raul? Teehee!
Raul: ... Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand what's-what's... what-why-how? Where!? Why that is it coming for me? Oh, sure! Maybe it's friendly!
Daen: ...Raul?
Arelei: Raul? ...Are you feeling... OK?
Raul: Meeeh? I'm j-just FABULOUS! ... ... ...
Daen: Raul? Raul!
Raul: Heeeyah! I cau't one! Lookit it! It's b-beautifrull. Breatufurul? Brea-brea-beautiful!
Daen: Are you drunk?!
Arelei: No way. I've never seen Raul drunk! Ever!
Raul: H-Hey, I've gooot an IDEA! Let's pleh dressshups!
Daen: Blast! Now's not the time!
Raul: You-you... khan be the daddy ... a-and I can be the mommy!
Arelei: And I'm not there to see it! ... what if he gets hurt? Or falls over? Or drinks too much?
Raul: ... no, way-wait. Gots it mix-eh again, didn't I?
Daen: I think he already HAD too much. Phell's with him though. OH GODS. PHELL.
Raul: Pheell? Shell. Bell. Clell. Smell. Well. Smell. Well. Tomaah-h-h-...
Arelei: Did you hang up?
Daen: *siiiiiiggghhh* What a help he was!
Arelei: Haven't you been flicking through the dossier?
Daen: Yes, obviously. All stuff we already know. Sraetl's in some smuggling business, using the abandoned sewers of the city.
Arelei: Eww.
Daen: Yeah. Let's just keep walking, we're half way there.
Hushed Voice: Hey, you're Daen Zin'fandel, right?
Daen: What? Who? Who are you?
Hushed Voice: Name's Palis. I know what you're up to. Can help. Meet you inside the Pischan Building. Not far from where you're going.
Daen: Hey, wait! Palis! What was that about?
Arelei: Um...
Daen: This city is so...

10 NCSY
Saract 28
10:41/26 Cycle "Late Morning" << MORE JOYOUS WALKING/OH MY GOD A SCENE TRANSITION
Delnaris City, Port Town, "Pischan Building"


Daen: Yes, I'm sure. It says Pischan outside.
Arelei: Abandoned. Swell place for a meeting.
Palis: I must apologise if the real estate isn't to your tastes, but this must be done.
Daen: You called us here. I'm curious why.
Palis: I'm an Enforcer with... historic dealings that Mister Africanus and I have done.
Daen: Then you're a corrupt Enforcer.
Palis: Hear me out. I have the information you're looking for. I was on a case with our mutual friend here. Before I could pin the evidence on him, he threatened to "deal with" my family and half the Enforcer Grid.
Arelei: What kind of information?
Palis: You aware of the suspicious deaths of Enforcers who crossed paths with Africanus? Well, until me, we were simply unable to pin Official Justification on him without hard evidence. I've got some recordings that'll change that.
Daen: I suspect you'll not hand them over for free?
Palis: No, I will. The full picture needs to be observed. It's no secret that the Enforcers are fighting a losing battle with the revolutionaries.
Daen: Actually, I never noticed.
Palis: The embargo doesn't discriminate. The city's own Enforcer Grid can't even get weapons ourselves!
Arelei: I don't like where this is going.
Palis: You could strike a deal with Sraetl. Convince him to allow us to use his smuggling routes!
Daen: Uh, OK. Whatever you say.
Palis: Thank you. You will be doing us a huge favour.
Arelei: I'm glad that you got us out of there quickly, but I have a feeling that you've decided something ...
Daen: This is all the info we need.
Arelei: Huh?
Daen: Sraetl's a crime lord. He's not going to let anyone tell him what to do. If we step foot in RS with THIS, then we're good as dead. We take it back to Trak.
Arelei: What about Palis?
Daen: Screw Palis!
Arelei: ...Ngh...
Raul: N-n-n-noticof shomething?
Arelei: Raul? Daen, you said you hung up!
Daen: I'm sure I did! We didn't hear him up until now!
Raul: Weeell... I've been reeaally QUIET! ... Shh!
Daen: What do you want?
Raul: W-What to I want? What... do you want? You're suppos'd to-tah-to be investa-gatin'. That Krin-si-pin-sile figureeeeeeya? And here you are with a strangely ...
Arelei: What...?
Raul: ... ... No, don't puts it there, you'll break it!!
Daen: I think he's questioning the greater threat. Krinsilith or Sraetl. Heh...
Arelei: Well, we know nothing of Krinsilith, but we know all about Sraetl...
Daen: You suggesting we get back to Trak?
Arelei: ...uh. Possibly.
Raul: ...--are my rooobot lovahr! Something-something-something ZZZZAAAAAAP! ...with your love...!
Daen: OK, Raul. Thanks for the help. Daen out.

10 NCSY
Saract 28
11:03/26 Cycle "Late Morning" << HALF AN HOUR--OF WALKING ALL THE WAY BACK--LATER
Delnaris City, Port Town, First Loading Dock Sector, Seedy Alley


Trax: Weeeell... Back so soon? We is impressed. Curious. Suspicious. You have data, no?
Daen: Got it right here.
Trax: Hahmmmmnn... Yes, yes, yes! This is good. This is grand, please us, you did. Here you stand!
Daen: Our deal. We need to know about Krinsilith.
Trax: Krinsilith, he made a deal. He was looking for you, that he was.
Arelei: What!?
Trax: We can offer you a list of locations he has traveled to in the past four years, should be music to your ears, no?
Daen: Why? Is there something there?
Trax: See for yourself... Mmmmhmmmhmmmhmmm!
Arelei: You said he was looking for us?
Trax: Yeeeesss, that is true. Paid off Enforcer Palin to stop you on your way, your journey, to say, oh yay. Wanted him to give you this information you bring before us!
Daen: What...?!
Trax: Oh, you suspect legitimacy of deal, do you not? Rest assured, that I can reveal ... information is as desired. Business is concluded. Good bye, you are saluted!
Arelei: That was fast. He disappeared quickly.
Daen: Raul? You there? I'm forwarding a list of locations I need you to identify.
Raul: I-I-I... I have the biggest headache. Oh, Phell, you didn't hit me over the head with that giant mallet, did you?
Daen: Raul?
Raul: Yeah, yeah. I've got it. Oh. Now that place, I don't know.
Daen: What is it?
Raul: Okay, most of these coordinates are pretty standard fare, not suspicious, but this one ... it comes up p-plenty of times.
Daen: And?
Raul: ... There you go. You'll need a vessel. And don't bring a warship! You'll draw way too much attention, that destination is in space.
Arelei: Oh joy.
Raul: Relax, it's not far, though it's not in a system. Have fun!
Arelei: You're seriously not going to do this, are you? Let other people handle it.
Raul: Do you realize who you're talking to? Daen probably already left.

10 NCSY
Saract 30
57 Units after Brygg launch
Acertis Sector, Freespace specifically 332,754 punits from destination
On-board Ombris, Current Crew: 2


Arelei: That's a biiig ship. So, Daen, What's your plan? You going to solo the dreadnought?
Daen: Well, I do have you. It wouldn't count.
Arelei: This is stupid! You didn't even ask for help!
Daen: Hey. You should be used to this by now. I go in without a plan or a second thought and rely on someone further down the road to pull me out of whatever sticky situation I got myself stuck into.
Raul: Daen? Arelei? If you can hear me--and I know you can!--you should be getting close to the target marker. Everything suggests that it's a Space-Hulk.
Arelei: Oh gods... "solo the dreadnought"? That was a joke!
Daen: Perfect... This is the part where you tell us everything we need to know.
Raul: Yes, yes, I was getting to that! Just give me a second ... It's got no registered owner and it's almost completely disabled. I'm reading that only vital support systems are active... and there's no power core. Should make things difficult for you, Daen. Sorry.
Arelei: Should I even ask?
Raul: Oh. Daen here needs at least a Tier-Five power source if he's going to clean anything up.
Daen: Heh heh.
Raul: I imagine he's wearing the stupidest looking grin you've ever seen?
Arelei: Ugh ... Yes.
Raul: I should give you some pointers, but I fear Daen would ignore me, so Arelei, pay attention.
Daen: I'm fine, really.
Raul: You might chance against a dreadnought, but your unconstrained ego couldn't touch this neglected beast. Look, just find a security station on the ship and drop their firewall. I'll see what I can do from there.
Arelei: Okay, but how do we uh... you know?
Raul: Just mash on some buttons, or try some voice commands. It should be easy.
Arelei: Wouldn't they have people in there?
Raul: Relax. The kind of people they post in those rooms would have nothing on Daen. He'll take care of them for ya. If his looks don't scare 'em off almost immediately, he may be forced to use his fists, or something.
Arelei: We're so unorganized for this.
Raul: Are we ever organised for anything? When Daen's in charge, nothing makes sense! In fact, I'm stumped on how we always make it out of the fire. Will you be OK in there, Arelei?
Arelei: Sure, I think.
Raul: Daen will make sure of that, right, Daen? Oh, and remember our little wager?
Daen: You won't be winning this time, Raul.
Raul: Yeah, whatever. You said that to Saenx last time. And before that. And before that. And before that. And bef--...
*Hollow echoing impact*
Arelei: Daen! Oh sure! Just kick the console ... Do you even know where to find a security station on a hulk?
Daen: Nope.

10 NCSY
Saract 30
58 Units after Brygg launch << AN HOUR OF PAINFUL SEARCHING LATER
Acertis Sector, Space-Hulk-37 "Original Dawn", Security-Station-12
Current Crew: 245


Arelei: You lied. Finding this place was too easy.
Daen: No, I didn't, actually.
Arelei: Then I guess your luck does factor into things. Start the search!
Daen: Uh... what am I looking for, exactly?
Arelei: Raul said to deactivate the ship's firewall.
Daen: How do we do that?
Arelei: Uhh... maybe if we...
Daen: Oooooh...
Arelei: Did you find something? ...Why are you staring at that unrealistically sized red button? Oh, and there's that sheepish smile again. Dammit, Daen! We're supposed to be looking for the network settings!
Daen: Aaaaaaaand open!
Raul: OH, FINALLY. TOOK YOU LONG ENOUGH. I THOUGHT YOU WERE CAPTURED AGAIN.
Arelei: Whoa, that's loud!
???: H-Hey! Freeze!
Daen: Buddy, I don't think you want to do this.
Delnarian Guard: Oh hoh oh, I think I do, sir.
Daen: Well, you asked for it...
*Struggling and shaking equipment rustling and grunting. The scuffle lasts a moment that seems to go longer than it should realistically*
Daen: Hah! There. Takes care of that problem.
Raul: Well, it's only a matter of time. The guard must've tripped the three alarms that are going throughout the ship, I've stopped them all before anyone started moving, fortunately... I think. Uh... I'm not actually sure if...
Arelei: ...Any ideas why anyone would set this computer to max volume?
Daen: Nope. Hey Raul, what do you have access to, there?
Raul: Theoretically, anything on unprotected protocol. Schedules, crew, supplies, but nothing on the Command Bridge.
Arelei: Could you find out what's going on?
Raul: Oh, got all the juicy info now.
Arelei: What?
Raul: ...
Daen: Raul?
Raul: Oh my gods.
Arelei: What is it?
Raul: These people? They're Delnarian. They have about sixteen Tier-Nine warheads on a flight deck. Everyone's assembled at the Centralis Atrium. If you could get me access to the Command Bridge, I could break off the flight deck!
Daen: Okay, mark it for me.
Raul: There! Get moving now!
Arelei: What's the damage report on the Centralis Atrium?
Raul: It's got air, gravity and security working--they would've heard that alarm. Other than that, it's un-powered.
Arelei: Okay, we're on our way. If anyone tries to intercept... well, do your best to inter-intercept them!
Raul: I can seal Priority-Two blast doors. The Centralis Atrium will still have a way to the Command Bridge, but I can play around with some stuff... this is going to be enjoyable.

10 NCSY
Saract 30
??? << THIS IS PROBABLY GOING ON AT THE SAME TIME AS EVERYTHING ELSE, I JUST DON'T WANT TO TELL YOU
Acertis Sector, Space-Hulk-37 "Original Dawn", Centralis Atrium


Krinsilith: The time is near, friends. It will soon be time to feast on the blood of infidels and heretics alike! How soon can we get a viable power core?
Delnarian Soldier: Not soon enough, brother! We will never find the opportunity if we do not properly deal with our esteemed guests!
Krinsilith: Yuellas and his ilk are below me! I will not waste my time on the intruders. I want to know the time required to complete the plan's final phase!
Dalnerian Patriot: Very well. Might as well make use of the extra power. What in the name of...?! Falasav! We have a problem. I am confident to say that our energy supply is being tampered with!
Falasav: I will not come this far to be stopped by meddling children. Krinsilith! You will dispose of the intruders. Go to the Command Bridge afterwards.
Krinsilith: Your wish is my command. You three, come with me!

10 NCSY
Saract 30
58 Units after Brygg launch
Acertis Sector, Space-Hulk-37 "Original Dawn",
Command Bridge Control Level


Arelei: I've never been on a Hulk before, but this ship is GIGANTIC. How long did it take to get here, anyway?
Daen: You don't want to know.
Arelei: OK, I'll start looking for the control board.
???: What--!? Fire! Purge this place of their taint!
Arelei: Eeek! Is that Krinsilith?!
Daen: I don't know. Want to ask?
Arelei: What? Are you crazy?! Just keep your head down, don't--
Daen: Hey, are you Krinsilith?!
???: Die!
Daen: He didn't say, but I got a good look at him. Definately him.
Arelei: What do we do?!
Delnarian Technician: Hey, what's all this racket? Have you any idea what level of silence is needed to calibrate our systems to better handle these fluxuations?!
Daen: Join the party!
Serkan Trooper: There they are! Attack!
Arelei: This is crazy! Let's just hurry up and find that panel!
???: Krinsilith, I commanded you to reduce the amount of intruders, not to host a fire-fight on the Bridge!
Krinsilith: Lord Falasav! This is unexpected.
Daen: Got it! Wait, what were we supposed to do again?!
Arelei: Dammit, Daen! Move over!
Raul: OKAY, I'M IN, THANKS.
Arelei: Does everyone keep the volume on max?!
Dalnerian Soldier: I am unsure. Ask Leaoh, over here.
Arelei: That was sarcastic!
Serkan Trooper: We need to move! Now!
Krinsilith: I am afraid I cannot allow you to do that--
Dalnerian Patriot: It's over, Lord Falasav! Serkan cruisers! They're everywhere!
Falasav: ...detonate the nukes.
Krinsilith: My lord?
Falasav: I gave you a command! Detonate the warheads!
Raul: Too late.
*Immense thundering and grinding lasting but a moment*
Raul: They seem to be missing, now.
Serkan Trooper: The ship is ours, gentlemen.

13 NCSY
Saract 30
20/24 Vernius Cycle "Late Evening" << ...THREE YEARS LATER
Acertis Sector, Planet Vernius Low Orbit, SCS Pionus Ignaire
"The Lounge"


Raul: And that's how we first encountered the Delnarians.
Alakaine: That is ...hhhh... an interesting tale. However, you seem to be lacking ...hhhh...
Arelei: Oh gods, whatever it is, don't say it! PLEASE!
Alakaine: Mmmm?
Raul: Speaking of which, Daen, wasn't that your latest capture?
Daen: No, it doesn't count. I wasn't captured at all!
Zyro: ... I ask you to clean up and this is what I get... How many babies did I burn in my previous life to deserve the universe's laziest crew?
Raul: Probably more than what's socially acceptable, I'd say. What with Daen's joyride downstairs.
Daen: What really bugs me is the timing of the fleet's arrival.
Raul: Daen, we're not all stupid. When I found out about your little mission, I sent a copy of the audio to Yuellas. When we found out that a Space-Hulk was involved, he said that he was going to get some outside help.
Zyro: Aberax happened to be in the neighbourhood and bam! Talk about convenient coincidences. However, I cannot help but wonder what I was missing...
Arelei: Raul? You recall spacing the nukes? Were they ever retrieved?
Raul: ...uh
Daen: Heh.
Zyro: ... Ooops.

"My name is Daen Zin'fandel. I uncovered a devious Delnarian plot poised to decimate at least sixteen worlds. I stopped that from happening. But I cannot help but wonder, what kind of people it takes to offer the commitment of atrocities. Who is Lord Falasav? Who is Krinsilith ... and why did he give me the evidence I needed to find out about the Space-Hulk, ultimately resulting with their deaths? But even with twisted puzzles, strategies and chilling calculations, wars are really simple sometimes."
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PostSubject: Re: Audio Recordings   Thu Jan 24, 2013 5:21 pm

Zyro's Bizarre Chronicles?

Zyro: Welp. They did it. It only took an enormous planetary armada to get our attention, but props are given.
Intelligence Officer: Sir! We have orders from a new CO. She wants us to rally to these coordinates.
Zyro: "She"? I don't like where this is going. If I find out that my suspicions are correct, then that'll make my day a far more interesting.
Arelei: Okay, Xier said that he's nearly done with his secret project, but he wanted to know about the situation.
Zyro: Of course. Fill her in, Phell.
Phell: Central High Command has assigned a new commanding officer to oversee the defence and counter attack against the Delnari Armada.
Daen: Who? What'd I miss?
Zyro: Perfect timing, Daen. I think your interruptions are getting far more inconvenient. Good job.
Arelei: Phell, who's the new CO?
Phell: Uh ... oh, here it is. "High Commander Kila Aberax".
Daen: Now that's a blast from the past.
Arelei: I remember the name. Who is he?
Zyro: She was one of the very best military leaders in history.
Arelei: I thought you forbid women from command positions.
Zyro: Well, we do mostly, but she's an exception.
Daen: Until Excentri changed that.
Zyro: Correct. CHC had an immense investment on Excentri, then Aberax blew it. Come to think of it, that event is ironically similar to our current conundrum.
Raul's Voice: Hey, uh, Engineering to Command Bridge? There's a little problem down here. You might need to send down a Fist, at least. This thing's going to kill everyone, otherwise!
Zyro: What's up, little brother?
Raul's Voice: Hurry! Hey, and I believe that we settled that! I should be the elder!
Zyro: Yeah, yeah. Just make sure you don't break another engine.
Raul's Voice: It was Daen's fault!
Daen: Maybe it was, but you should've stopped me. Really, Raul. I'm disappointed.
Raul's Voice: Sure, kick me when I'm down!
Arelei: Is that headache still wearing you down? Did you bother to take that medication I sent?
Raul's Voice: I know and it's not. I've got bigger problems than migraines named after careless shipmates ... Uh, I don't want to alarm anyone, but the Death-Bot's left.
Zyro: Knew it.
Arelei: What do you mean by that? Left?
Raul's Voice: Did I say Death-Bot? I really mean, uh, err ... okay, I got nothin'.
Zyro: Just think about all that time that could have been spent on work instead of that abomination!
Raul's Voice: Work? What do you expect me to do down here? Stare intensely at fuel meters?!
Zyro: Sounds like a great idea to me. There'd be less dying.
Raul's Voice: Ha ... ha ... ha. I'm laughing too hard. That's me ... laughing. Too hard.
Arelei: Anyway, Xier's waiting for a response, so I'll be on my way.
Zyro: Daen, I want you to go find Raul's pet project and put it out of our misery.
Daen: Fine. I'll do so on the condition that you tell me what happens up here.
Zyro: Hmm. Phell, are there any new articles concerning our dear friend Administrator Saenx in circulation?
Phell: The latest being about a religious killing streak, but that's nothing new.
Zyro: We both know that Xier's nowhere near completing that device without help ... Considering Saenx's career expertise, it'd be swell to have another atomically volatile mass-murderer on board. See if he wants a front row seat of inane unfortunates and unexplained shenanigans aboard the "Pious Interceptor".

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PostSubject: Re: Audio Recordings   Sat Mar 23, 2013 1:41 pm

RYYHARGON FORWARD COMMAND CENTRE "SERKAN-RYYHARGON CONFERENCE", PLANET RAX
"EARLY MORNING"

Ryyhargon Speaker: You enter our halls not with arms in palms, but with a... tame conscious. What is it that you want?
Trax: It's simple. We kill the Delnari.
Ryyhargon Speaker: If it's so simple, why haven't you done it?
Trax: If you're good at something, never do it for free!
Ryyhargon Speaker: Carry on to the purpose of this meeting. You will not stall us longer than we agreed on.
Serkan Diplomat: There is no purpose of this meeting. We're wasting our time dealing with peasants.
Trax: Stay your tongue, Ken Jarelaar. We have... tasty information on every breathing organism in this room. You have an interesting Network browsing history, might we add? But you wouldn't wish your two adopted daughters to know about what you did with that pineapple, now, how, would you?
Serkan Diplomat: What are you babbling on about? Are you threatening me, Trax?
Trax: Be but healthy advice from one spawn to another. Hmmhmmhmm.
Ryyhargon Speaker: There will be no unnecessarities in my hall. We have topic at hand to consider then after we hace concluded this meeting, we may part our ways and resume killing each other.
Trax: Do not look so upset, master Speaker. You will be glad we have yet to spill your beans, as they say, the seams will loose and break at the sound of truth... if you are prepared to hear it.
Ryyhargon Speaker: Why, you!
Aberax: That will be enough, Trax.
Trax: Mnn... as you wish of us.
Aberax: We humble representatives of the Triumvirate hereby extend a hand of agreement to mutual isolation, if you are prepared to accept it.
Ryyhargon Speaker: And that would only happen if we are to ignore your past sins.
Aberax: Mine own sins, you say? Forgive me to be so bold, but no sins have been commited under a triple banner. No, t'was no fault of ours, but of past brawls. We do not stand here yesteryear, but today on this day in such braceless form.
Ryyhargon Speaker: Our wants are outlined, but what will you demand to take us there?
Aberax: Demand? Nay. But at prompt call of aid should the other respond with quick swords and open hearts.
Ryyhargon Speaker: After crushing our homes and slaughtering our people? Heavy terms, considering your not so neighbourly conduct. Though, I'm no fool. Our souls don't need to be at war. I will allow my own councilors to open discussion.
Daen: Lower the threats, but I think we're making progress.
Aberax: Optimism favours the unfortunate.
Daen: Right. Let's just reach a decision here soon.
Aberax: Then we be on the same page. The rest of these Ryyhargon patrons, however seem to be more than a few chapters behind.
Daen: So how do we convince them to help us out?
Trax: Help? They will not help us, oh no.
Daen: Isn't that part of the plan?
Trax: Then give them an offer they cannot refuse.
Daen: A peace treaty?
Aberax: An invitation.
Daen: To a party?
Aberax: The Triumvirate.
Daen: Wait, seriously?
Trax: Natives are getting restless.
Main-screen Broadcast: Lord Falasav: Cockroachs are to be crushed, rodents exterminated, heretics silenced. Instruments of the I'ade cannot be shaken from this absolute mission.
PA: Alert. Condition Four is now in effect. All non-combatants are hereby ordered to evacuate.
Ryyhargon Speaker: What treachery is this?
Serkan Diplomat: That was my question to you, Trax!
Daen: Well shit.
Aberax: This is unfortunate.
Trax: The time to flee calls like a howl soaked in moonlight!

ENGINEERING ASSEMBLY, CCS PIONUS IGNAIRE
"UNSPECIFIED TIME"

Arelei: An hour later and nothing changes. Need some help?
Xier: Silence will help. Must concentrate.
Arelei: Okay, but don't get your hand stuck in there again.
Zyro: Knock knock... This ... is the Administrator.
"The Administrator": Saenx. So, this is the device, I presume?
Xier: Yes. Not fully assembled.
Saenx: I did assume it to be bigger. From the colourful promises I was forced to digest, it seemed to be invisioned as grand. It doesn't look grand.
Zyro: Bah, it's just a prototype.
Saenx: Everyone says that. It still doesn't look grand.
Arelei: Welcome to our humble abode! Arelei Arestapoli at your service.
Saenx: Who are you?
Arelei: That's Xier, over there.
Saenx: Beg your pardon. I mean yourself.
Arelei: I just said it. Arelei.
Saenx: I apologise. It's difficult to hear anything in here, what with the sheer amount of 'grand' echoing through the room.
Zyro: We're going to have fun around here. Would you like someone to escort you to your room?
Saenx: That shan't be necessary. I'd like to familiarise myself with your ship as soon as possible. But do inform me of anything I need to know.
Zyro: Observation Room Black is strictly off-limits. And don't even think about asking why or funding your own private investigation. Many have tried and failed.
Saenx: I will inspect the experimental shield generator at a later date. Good day.
Arelei: ... And he's gone. Great.
Zyro: Can you feel the rainbows and sunshine?
Xier: Silence will help. Must concentrate.
Zyro: Sure thing, doc, we'll get outta your hair. I've actually got work to do. I think. Well, I should.
PA: Phell's Voice: Fleet Commander, I have a priority one call. It's from the negotiatory conference hall on Rax.
Zyro: Phell, your wonderful timing never ceases to amaze me. No complaints though.
Arelei: Never a dull moment, huh?

CCS PIONUS IGNAIRE COMMAND BRIDGE

Trax's Transmission: Fleet Commander Zyro Yuellas.
Zyro: As they call me. What's up?
Trax's Transmission: On behalf of the state, We extend a request, an order, a mission to yourself and any able-body you might choose, to investigate a small setting on Naoi, yes, yes.
Zyro: A setting?
Trax's Transmission: Recent... negotiations with the Ryyhargon have made an investigation of the status of the I'ade a prime necessity. The location has been sent. Take my caution here and now. You are not to travel with your ship or fleet. You will not be conspicuous and you will not be impressed with what you might find.
Zyro: And what will we be "finding"?
Trax's Transmission: A sign, you must find. That of Delnari and I'ade leagueship. A reason, we say, for the Delnari to attack, for the I'ade to give the order.
Zyro: Fine. Though I will need some way of getting there.
Trax's Transmission: We have issued a corvette to your fleet. This tool you will use to accomplish our goal.
Zyro: What's wrong with my own corvettes? Look! I've got four sitting there! ...doing nothing...!
Trax's Transmission: Your corvettes are installed with IFF protocols. We will not accept any chance of detection. We have our reasons, yes... that we do. Hohoho!
Daen: What... the...
Trax's Transmission: Well, Daen Zin'fadel. Business was pleasurable, no?
Daen: Zyro, why is he there? On the screen ... talking...
Zyro: Hey, don't look at me. He called us.
Trax's Transmission: That we did, under direct instruction.
Zyro: See? There you go.
Arelei: Oh... my... What th--...
Daen: I had the same reaction. Wait a moment ... we got onto the same elevator ... how did you...? Nevermind.
Arelei: So, what's going on?
Zyro: Oh, nothing really. We're just going to go look at something for a bit. After our ride gets here.
Arelei: What are you doing to that chair?
Daen: Mm? Oh, nothing. Just spinning.
Arelei: Huh.
Daen: My favourite bit is the fact that this isn't a swivel chair. It was dead-bolted to the floor when I first saw it.
Zyro: Wait, what?
Daen: Nothing!
Zyro: If there's no reason for you to be up here, I'd like you to leave the bridge. Preferably before you break something else.
Daen: Don't forget our deal!
Zyro: Might have slipped my mind. I broke it off after you 'displaced' that heavy-tank in the garden.
Daen: Aw, don't be like that.
Zyro: Anyway, Arelei, got something for me?
Arelei: No sir. Just following Daen.
Daen: When have I ever given you a reason not to trust me?
Zyro: Look at what you're sitting on.
Daen: Oh, yeah.
Arelei: There's a reason why archeologists exist. Just who sent the order?
Zyro: The State. That's what Trax said.
Daen: Why was he the messanger?
Zyro: Why are you still here?
Daen: Sigh. Fine.

PIONUS IGNAIRE, DECK SEVEN CANTINA

Daen: I'm back.
Raul: Did you see it?
Daen: Yup. Just as you said. Broken.
Phell: How exciting. The 'Mystery of the Broken Chair'.
Daen: I've done better.
Phell: We know. But what's the biggest 'victim' to fall under your hands?
Daen: Other than the engine Raul was looking at...
Raul: You bastard.
Daen: I'd say that it would be that space hulk three years ago.
Raul: That doesn't count. It was all me.
Phell: Fine. What was the most life-threatening moment?
Daen: That spider tank that Raul had captured over at the foundry on Tibascas.
Raul: That whole incident could've been averted if you only listened.
Phell: I heard about it, but I didn't get the specifics.
Daen: You're the Intelligence Officer... and the rest of the crew knows that story.
Phell: I know. Everyone on this ship is bad at their job.
Raul: Except Daen. Where would we be without his superior leadership skills?
Daen: Yup. Superior.
Raul: Anyway, when I picked up Daen in the tank, he got into the gun position, but I didn't know that he couldn't read the language inscribed on the panels. He couldn't tell the 'dissemble' from the 'lights' switch.
Daen: You can't really blame me.
Raul: Yes I can. I told you that the was the one in the middle!
Daen: I thought you said that the light was on the left side.
Raul: That model didn't have internal lights! Apparently that makes it easier to detect somehow. Well, that's what I overheard, anyway. He ended up dropping all of the armour plates that protect the whole thing.
Daen: It was a bad tank.
Raul: The very moment that happened, half a dozen Ryyhargon opened up on us.
Daen: It even had windows, so we could wave at them.
Raul: After somehow breaking off the body, it started rolling about the place with us inside it, crushing anything in its path. And what was Daen doing? He was eating my biscuits. MY biscuits.
Daen: If it's any consollation, I nearly choked on it.
Raul: And that's the closest Daen was ever close to death. Choking on stolen biscuits in a rolling tank.
Arelei: Hello, Raul. Hello, Phell.
Phell: Drink?
Arelei: Sure. Oh, and what was Raul like drunk?
Raul: About that...
Phell: He proposed to a lamp. There was a serenade, flowers, choices for baby names.
Daen: Totally not going overboard.
Raul: Guys.
Phell: But then the lamp requested a divorce and a restraining order.
Raul: Really. It's important.
Phell: Then he was tried for attempted murder. Though he said that he "sure as hell am not paying allimony for those brats!"
Raul: Okay, now that part didn't happen.
Phell: You just don't remember.
Raul: I wasn't drunk! It's physically impossible for me to be drunk!
Daen: Then why were you ... a little...?
Raul: After you left, I went to get something to eat, then I woke up when you called that day. Must've been something I ate.
Phell: And no-one remembered that you don't have the ability to be drunk. No-one at all. Not even Arelei.
Arelei: Er...
Daen: Then the question is how Raul even got like that.
Arelei: Maybe it was Krinsilith? He had to come to our hotel for a reason.
Daen: But why would he...? Or how could he drug Raul?
Phell: Probably to keep him from doing something?
Daen: Would've been easier to kill him.
Raul: I'd like to see Krinsilith try.
PA: Zyro: Executive officers to the damn hall. Now.
Daen: Welp, you heard him.
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PostSubject: Re: Audio Recordings   Sun May 19, 2013 2:09 pm

OPERATION RAINBOW COW
REDSTON CITY, EKEDANI ERYKK



Isyl
> Mostly comic relief, but useful to contrast the rest of the characters. He controls the mood of the setting, a good pointer to the subtle theme of insanity. He's awesomely good at doing anything he wants to, but for unknown reasons, he is never promoted.

Daen
> Drive for the plot, and is in a position to do so, being Chief of Staff of the CCS Pionus Ignaire. Besides being a field leader, he has no special roles, but is always present.

Raul
> A major support who requisitions the gear for the team to use, or builds it himself. He gets the resources for the show to go on.

Arelei
> Mega-support for the entire team. Does everything from healing on the field to acting as a multipurpose liaison.

Zyro
> Only ever appears when significant plot events occur. In charge of the greater scheme of things, but prefers to direct the team to do things for him.

Sehki
> Besides being an exceptional warrior, or a tool to get things done, Sehki has no plot value.

Leandryk
> Major antagonist with history with the team. A known strategist who recently influenced the outcome and course of the Ekedani Campaign, but shit went down, and for that reason, the team hates his guts and want to gut him. Gut-gut-gut.




Isyl
Hello. I am a jelly fish

Daen
No. You are not a fucking jelly fish! Put that frog down!

Raul
Rookies.

Daen
This is a serious operation! Where is your honour?

Isyl
I am jellyfish. I need not honour.

Arelei
Daen, Team Two is in position for the operation. The target has yet to be sighted.

Daen
Good enough. Begin phase three.

Arelei
Four

Daen
Begin phase four

Isyl
What happened to One and Two?

Daen
Close your jaws, or I shall bind them shut!

Isyl
Jellyfish need no jaws. Jellyfish is jellyfish.

Daen
Grr…

Isyl
Ribbit~!

Zyro
Yuellas here, is the operation complete?

Daen
No, it just commenced

Zyro
You’re getting sloppy, Daen

Daen
It would be nicer if I had…

Isyl
Meow, goes the spoon! Wait, that reminds me, Raul. Black collars are in, this week. Better set your wardrobe!

Daen
…other troops.

Zyro
Just another challenge, for you. I need not remind you how important this operation is.

Daen
Oh, of course you do. I failed to notice.

Isyl
…Suppose that’s real gold floating in here?

Raul
Hey! Get your mitts off that! Those things will go BOOM if you even look at them hard enough!

Arelei
Target sighted and confirmed!

Zyro
Look. Arelei’s on the field. Goes to show you how short on staff we are.

Daen
Are preparations ready?

Sehki
Aldoranis reporting in. My current position is inadequate. Request permission to go up a level?

Daen
Request acknowledged. Raul, have you sights on the target area?

Raul
No! I already said we have no ammo!

Daen
What? What do you mean by that?

Raul
Isyl was in charge of the containers, but he threw them off the seventh floor when that moth bat spooked him. I did request a drop.

Daen
When?

Isyl
It was a non-believer! It had to be cleansed!

Raul
It’s an Indigo Mothbat with a broken wing!

Isyl
The taint of the Cold Sun God Triarch!

Raul
Is the shipment on the way?

Daen
It is now. Does anyone have eyes on the target?

Arelei
He’s sitting by the really big north-western table reading this week’s edition of ‘World’s Greatest Cereals’.

Raul
Oh, really? Gotta get me a copy.

Daen
That last bit was not absolutely necessary, Arelei

Raul
I beg to differ. I forgot to remind myself to pick up a replacement after Isyl ate it.

Isyl
I didn’t eat it!

Raul
I saw you! You emptied a bottle of rainbow sauce on it, but discarded it on the basis that there was too much sauce!

Isyl
Where’s the proof? I demand to see the evidence!

Raul
I have access to the ship’s surveillance feeds. I’ll show you after the op.

Isyl
Lies and forgeries! Nothing but fabrication born from the hands of a nark! Case closed!

Raul
What the Ether’s a ‘nark’?!

Daen
All units maintain radio silence.

Isyl
Isyl will not bow to nark supremacists. The gracious jellyfish kings will liberate all!

Arelei
Um, everyone? The target is leaving the living room.

Daen
Sehki, report?

Sehki
Nearly there. Had to slip through the hallway without stepping on any of the stray cats.

Raul
No! Isyl! Don’t shake that! You’ll --*thunderous explosion* … Transmission terminated.

Daen
Raul, respond!

Zyro
Fleet Commander Zyro Yuellas. Attention all Serkan forces operating on Ekedani Erykk, cease all military operations immediately and recall to the Ignaire. That is all.

Daen
Zyro, we have a little problem here. What’s going on?

Zyro
Well, we have a big problem up here.

Daen
It can wait. Raul and Isyl are --

Zyro
Daen, directions come from Triumvirate High Command directly ... they know.

Daen
Blast! And we were so close.

Leandryk
No, you were not close. I have paid attention to all chatter since this operation began. I am not impressed.

Daen
Identify yourself!

Arelei
The target’s gone!

Leandryk
I need no introductions. I will not remain here. But do give my regards to Fleet Commander Yuellas.

Daen
You may tell him yourself.

Leandryk
Not paying attention, are you?

Arelei
Long range communications are jammed!

Daen
Ground team, storm the building! All other units, report!

Raul
Daen! Stop the operation!

Daen
Raul! Does Isyl still breathe?

Raul
Listen to me, the containers -- they’re all trapped! Isyl found our ammo container, then he --

Leandryk
I’ll leave you to your post-operation cleaning. You were never close. Farewell.

Sehki
Aldoranis reporting. Nothing out of the ordinary, besides a batch of fake stray cats of the high-explosive flavour.

Raul
The entire operation was a trap.

Daen
We have no choice. Transmissions from High Command are always clear. We have to abandon Ekedani.

Arelei
We can’t just let Leandryk walk away!

Daen
We have to.

Isyl
Bah! Let’s get him anyway!

Raul
I’ll drink to that.

Sehki
His sins are inexcusable. Count myself among your ranks.

Daen
Fine. Let’s just get everyone to the ship in one piece.

Isyl
Raul’s buying the drinks!

Raul
Isyl, you volunteered for this time.

Isyl
Lies! Lies and forgeries!

Arelei
Can’t keep them from each other’s throats for more than a heart beat.

Daen
All operation agents comply with contingent order. We’re going home.
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PostSubject: Re: Audio Recordings   Wed Mar 05, 2014 3:46 am

Planet Brigondon, during the Delnari-Ryyhargon Invasion of District Daanfroth of the Basis Arm of the Serkan Confederacy of the Serkan Triumvirate

ARBITER
Raul Suddenius, you stand before the Arbiter's Court accused of heinous crimes. Do you have any comments to make regarding the charge of cruelty to animals, destruction of state property and negligent driving?

RAUL
(If there's one lesson Zyro Yuellas never fails to stress, it's to have a plan.)
No, I have no comment.

ARBITER
Fine. We will then proceed.

RAUL
(I don't have a plan.)

ARBITER
Mister Mercer, if you please, display the first picture on screen. Now then, mister Suddenius, is this you handling the cadolv on the two-hundred-seventieth floor of the 'Boys r Us' casino in Barrent City during the diplomatic congress, two weeks ago today?

RAUL
Yes. That's me.

ARBITER
And is it true that-

ZYRO
Who the flying fuck declares war for no reason? Does anyone know what kind of strain this puts on the nations involved? Oh, and you guys should consider firing the waiter downstairs. No sense of balance, that one.

ARBITER
Oh, son of a bitch. Mister Mercer, please remove this man.

ZYRO
Stay where you are, you piece of shit, Mercer. I, am the lawful defendant of the accused, right here.

RAUL
(Well, at least he's not late. Wait, why is he wearing a wig? Does he hope the court will take him seriously? God dammit, I'm

fucked.)

ARBITER
Then I suppose it can't be helped. However, I will request that you refrain from making bursts of inappropriate comments.

ZYRO
Yes, if you wish, of course. However, I will ask that you read out my pal's charges.

ARBITER
Before I do, I will ask you a question.

ZYRO
Yes, go right ahead.

ARBITER
Have you ever met Raul Suddenius before?

RAUL
Yes, he's my-

ZYRO
No, of course I haven't. Not directly, anyway. If I did that would be breaking the law. I read about him in the paper, I hear he's got quite a lovely singing voice. But oh, where are my manners? My name is Trax Raffaentricktus.

ARBITER
Is that so, mister Raffaentricktus?

ZYRO
Yes, you must have mistaken me for someone else. With respect, sir, I do get that quite a bit back home in, eh...Winter-Roadia.

ARBITER
Then it is my mistake. You bear similar likeness to Zyro Yuellas. Mister Suddenius, have you ever heard of that man? He is known for his skills of causing problems in high court cases.

ZYRO
Mister Suddenius, you don't need to answer that question. It's irrelevant. We're getting off topic, now aren't we? Arbiter, shall we proceed with the proceedings that need be proceeded?

ARBITER
We will. Right after you remove that wig.

ZYRO
Excuse me?

ARBITER
Your ridiculous wig! Take it off.

ZYRO
I have no... what?

ARBITER
Mister Mercer, if you please.

ZYRO
Whoa whoa whoa whoa, freeze where you stand, you piece of shit, Mercer! You wouldn't want the esteemed residents of this hall to know about what you did to Sc-kkkrikolol's wife's ass with that skirrid, would you?

RAUL
Wait... isn't Sc-kkkrikolol the Ryyhargon constrider who keeps attacking us?

ZYRO
Ah... Arbiter, your facial expression tells me everything I need to know. You made a mistake there, losing your composure like that. Isyl, come out, come out, wherever you are!

ISYL
AND I WAS NEVER A MUSHROOM IN THE FIRST PLACE?

RAUL
Wait, what was he doing in there?

ISYL
Okay, mister master, what goal do you have for myself and myself?

ZYRO
Just do the thing with the thing.

ISYL
I will certainly do the thing you told me with the thing, but I would like to ask that mister master a question.

ZYRO
Raul, word of advice, leave the room. Start running. Very fast.

ARBITER
What do you think you're doing, mister Suddenius?

ZYRO
I'm certain that Isyl, here, would like to ask you a question.

ISYL
Yes, and that would be... Have you ever read that book about a girl named Parvana? Remember the time where she was killed when the top floor of the tower exploded?


SOON™


DARLA
We're bringing you live coverage of a suspected terrorist bombing at the First Law Tower in Baldoka, capital of District Daanfroth. The explosion appears to have originated from inside the building and its internal sensors have been damaged, so we are not sure about who survived. The attack occured seventeen minutes ago and no-one has claimed responsibility. There has been no official response from the military or government at this time.

RAUL
Hey, I recognise her. Isn't she--

ZYRO
The reporter from Di-Channel News? Of course. Regardless of the fact she has only been in the public eye for half a term, she has a disturbingly disproportionate fan-following. I wonder why.

RAUL
No, not that. I think she's my cousin.

ZYRO
Wait, what? If you think she's your cousin, good on you. But I think you probably should remember something like that. Hell, I remember how many trees there are on the beach of my childhood home.

RAUL
She didn't frequent the family gatherings. We had a lot of those.

ZYRO
We had fifteen. There was a particularly big one we would always climb on.

RAUL
Uh, what are you talking about?

ZYRO
The trees. The trees on the damn beach. You weren't paying attention, were you?

RAUL
Were you?

ZYRO
I hate waiting.

RAUL
What happened to the other guy?

ZYRO
Isyl? Who the fuck knows? I thought he'd be the right man for the job, having no problems with everything up to the... My train of thought stopped long before the escape route aspect-thingy came into the picture.

RAUL
Hey, what's that building?

ZYRO
Oh that, that's the main building for the Leading Sciences Commission. Oh, what a coincidence. That's also the place your "package" is being held.

RAUL
Status?

ZYRO
You think I'd say in public?

RAUL
Eh...

ZYRO
Well, rest assured we found a use for it, and you'll probably be promoted.

RAUL
Yay.

ZYRO
Oh wait, you've already been promoted for it. Whoops.

RAUL
Damn.

ISYL
Damn right. Damn-damn-damn. Hey, a dam!

ZYRO
'Bout time you got here.

RAUL
Oh, shit.

ZYRO
Yeah... We should probably think about considering the run.

ISYL
Not my fault. I just wanted to sniff those flowers. And that purse. And that statue. *Deep nasal inhale*

ZYRO
Gods fucking dammit. Just start running, Isyl.


(o_o),),),),),),),),)


ZYRO
Not used to running away from mobs are you, Raul?

RAUL
Can't say it's a favourite past-time. Why were they chasing you, Isyl?

ISYL
......Think they know I know about the plot?

RAUL
What plot?

ISYL
The narks always have a plot.

ZYRO
Nope. Stop. No more, don't continue. Just don't even start. Look. Remember the Ryyhargon constrider that happens to be slightly more compitent than the other shitstains we fight? Sc-kkkrikolol? He was the arbiter.

RAUL
Whoa shit, really? Damn. How did you know?

ZYRO
You can thank that piece of shit Mercer for that. I'd rather not talk about what we had to exchange to make that deal happen, so leave it in the past. Think I'll have him whacked.

ISYL
Hello, Trax.

TRAX
This one greets you, in the same manner and same bleet.

ZYRO
...Well shit.

TRAX
Swept up in the duties of your new post, Lord Commander? Forgive my intrusion, but I speak with the full authority appointed to me as fitting as the one who gave you the Naoi mission... Why are you not on Naoi?

ZYRO
Funny story, that. You see, Naoi was blockaded by some of our own side saying that they're under orders from Ultimate Supreme Something-or-rather Chairman Taldön. So, we kind of started focusing on the warfront with the Delnari and Ryyhargon.

TRAX
...Did you use the corvette?

ZYRO
Of course I did. Sent a team to Naoi. They're there as we speak. Remember Daen? You know Daen.

TRAX
They're there, you speak, but yourself are displaced, not present there, but present here, at the smouldering foot of a burning state building?

ISYL
Oh... it's you! Let me see your face. You're the one from my dream! You...! You are his majesty, the mother-fucking jellyfish king!

TRAX
Ah, you, hoho. You recognise myself, I, the mother-fucking jellyfish king? You are worthy of my attention.

ISYL
I am worthy of your mother-fucking attention!

TRAX
I will speak, and you will answer.

ISYL
I will motherfucking listen, then I will mother-fucking answer.

TRAX
Why is this one here and not there, at the nest of relics, the place we gave the birth name Naoi, that which rhymes with yaoi?

RAUL
Uhm, about that...
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